stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
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