I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Randomize