I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize