just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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