i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
