I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
