I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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