Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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