yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
