I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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