I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
