well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
