Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Randomize
