ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I wish I only lived at night.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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