Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
