And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Randomize
