i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
you had me at cake vodka
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Randomize
