I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Randomize
