Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
