What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
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