Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
