As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize