so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Randomize
