And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
