girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
