I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
im calling her cock vulture from now on
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I am mentally ready for anal.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize
