He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
