your thong is hanging out like whoa
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
