mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
