She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Randomize
