and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
