Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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