I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
