I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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