sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
