im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i was born a porn star she said
there was a trapeze. enough said
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Randomize