After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Randomize
