Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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