if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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