Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
