I forgot how hot balto sounded
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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