so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize
