I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize
