Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
