All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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