i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Randomize
