Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
