is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
