We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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