he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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