HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
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