I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
