Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
